A mayfly is born in May. It flies about for a day and dies. Within that day it has relations with another mayfly. The impregnated mayfly then lives for exactly 12 months and dies when it gives birth, exactly 12 months later, to another mayfly, which either impregnates and dies or is impregnated and lives for another 12 months.
The lesson of this, if you are to come back as a Mayfly, is to try and resist the almighty urge to impregnate another mayfly and, instead, get up the duff yourself as quickly as you can. You won't be able to drink, smoke or eat soft cheese and prawns for your entire life but at least you'll experience a Pancake Day and, if you're lucky, a Royal wedding.
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